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Bigger Is Better in Bed

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There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Ezekiel 23:20, often called the dirtiest passage in The Bible.

The bigger the penis is, the better the sex is.

This assumption is a staple of modern fiction when it comes to Sex Tropes. It's the reason why Compensating For Something is, by its very nature, an insult — everybody knows that a real man has a big dick. A heroic character, when his penis is mentioned (which isn't all that often, except by innuendo), will usually have a big one.

Consequently, this is also the reason why villainous or loser characters are portrayed as having a small penis, or something else small meant to represent a penis. It's a deficiency that makes them bad people, or at least not cool like the heroes are. By further extension, Good People Have Good Sex, to some degree because they're usually well-endowed.

In Real Life, size is not everything. In fact, a sufficiently large penis (pretty much anything around the ten-inch zone) will actually hurt the receiver—there's no such thing as an O-Ring Orifice. Unsurprisingly, most writers don't really think through the implications of having a penis this size penetrate someone whose hips might actually be smaller. Moreover, most fictional cases tend to focus on penis length. However, the vagina actually has very few nerve endings past the opening - so to the extent that women care about size, they're mostly interested in girth.

Fan fic lemons have a tendency to exaggerate this trope to an even greater extreme. This might be strange if we consider that most fan fic writers are girls, but makes sense considering that a) many of these girls have no sexual experience, and b) many women simply like their fictional guys well hung. And as for the guys...yeah. The term "doomcock" (possibly coined by fandom-wank, although more likely derived from Starr's gun-fondling Madness Mantra in Preacher) is used in fan fic criticism circles to refer to such an appendage. Frequently the precise dimensions are given, which conjures up the image of the PoV-character getting out a tape measure mid-act. For the record, according to That Other Wiki, 90% of men have penises between 5 and 7 inches in length (13 - 18cm), and less than 2% are above 8".

Obviously, this is a subtrope of Bigger Is Better. When a large penis has comedic value instead of sexual value, see Gag Penis. See also IKEA Erotica. For female breasts that are big, it's either Buxom Is Better or Gag Boobs. In order for women to take most men of this nature, they'd also need an O-Ring Orifice, as would a man on the receiving end.

When a writer goes extreme, then most likely they fail Sex Education (as well as Biology, for the very worst of cases) forever. Alternately, it may be a case of Writers Cannot Do Math.

ExamplesEdit

AdvertisingEdit

  • There's a late-night infomercial for a penis-enlargement pill with "testimonials", and among them is a woman who calmly states that the biggest penis she has ever been with was "ten or eleven inches" like it was no big deal, acting pretty calm about the fact she most likely had sex with a horse (or a very abnormal man).
  • "Over 88% of women say that size DOES matter. And the other 12% are lying."- Opening line from 'Extamax' commercial. It later uses the Empire State Building, and pictures labeled 'actual disappointment' and 'actual hopelessness'.
  • Spam for penis-enlargement pills. Perhaps most notable, not to mention worrying, was the spammer who sent out e-mails with the subject line: "12 more inches ain't so bad, dont you think so?". 12 more inches?

Anime & MangaEdit

  • Roberto from Monster. If we are to believe the obese prostitute with whom he was having sex.
  • Randel Oland from Pumpkin Scissors. The amazing size of his penis leads to one nurse at the hospital where he's staying to become obsessed with finding a hospital male urinal (like this one) that would fit him. This leads to a running joke where the nurse constantly attacks him during his stays with urinals she's reinforced or new attempts at shoving him in them. It goes without saying that Randel is appropriately terrified of her.
  • Refreshingly Subverted by the hentai manga Slut Girl in which our hero Satoru is called average-sized by his freeloading harem but more than makes up for it by his raw libido and stamina.
  • In the Lolita Core Hentai series, the guys are typically about two feet long, and proportionately thick. The gals don't seem to have any trouble. Despite being also all Lolicon and Shotacon aged.
  • Panty from Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt certainly believes this, but this trope is actually subverted when she regrows her hymen and tries to have sex with Brief - his size just makes it even more painful.

ComicsEdit

  • Several characters in the Italian porn series Ramba. Deconstructed; it is shown as being painful to the women involved, and is sometimes used to deliberately torture them.
  • In the Love And Rockets "Palomar" stories, Gato, who has been married to both Pipo and Guadalupe, has a huge one. Pipo has apparently become accustomed to it and doesn't think much of average-sized men. She dates Igor, of comparable size (Gato and Igor actually compare in a bathroom), and later has several sexual encounters with an unnamed, sleazy-looking character who dwarfs even Gato and Igor. She has no problem with his size in any opening, an example of O-Ring Orifice. But then there's Fritzi, who has a fulfilling sex life with mostly average-sized men - ironically including Pipo's son Sergio - and is twice married to the "love of her life," Scott the Hog. He's described as having a barely functioning "choad."
  • Killer Condom and To The Bones by Ralph König:
    • Exaggerated, parodied and deconstructed: inspector Maccaroni sports a 40 cm thing. He's shown having a first time with a rentboy, who thinks he cannot handle it despite his profession. Maccaroni claims that "they all whine like that in the beginning, but in the end, they all love it". However, Maccaroni is unhappy because he feels that his lovers only love his penis and think they tend to forget that "there's a person hanging from it".
    • Discussed: Maccaroni meets a similarly well-endowed porn actor, and they have a talk about how very large penises can be troublesome.

Fairy TalesEdit

  • A collection of fairy tale porn. There was a magic cock ring that grew a man's endowment to a length of about half a league. He could only wear it partly on his finger in order to not cause irreparable damage to the woman he was with, and the woman's mother died in a tragic accident when she tried to sex him up in his sleep, and the ring slid all the way onto his finger...

Fan FicEdit

  • The fanfic version of this trope, taken to its logical extreme. (The link doesn't go to the fic itself, just the fanfic-rants post about it. The fic itself, unfortunately, is lost.)
  • In the fan-dubbed Fisting the North Star, one of the characters is actually named "Biggus Dickus." Naturally, it also abuses other sexual tropes.
  • This flaw shows up far too often in slashier Redwall fanfiction (which is extremely rare, but with this kind of mental image, once is too many). Thanks to the Flip Flop Of God on whether the animals are human-sized or animal-sized, and the habit in fanfic of specifying penis size in inches, it's not unknown for the reader to have to stop and try not to picture a character with a penis bigger than the rest of their entire body. Otter/mouse is problematic enough when the option of human-sized anthromorphs is on the table, but when it's described as "as thick as his fist" you've got a problem (link thankfully to MSTing). Made much, much worse in this case by the fact that the author of the fic being MSTed forgot the apostrophe when his lutrine character announced that his equipment was "larger than most otters". Punctuation saves lives, people; that wouldn't sound nearly as bad if it was "bigger than most otters'.
  • A (generally surprisingly good) slash of Snow White includes a thirty-foot-long dragon that enjoys being deep-throated by humanoid species, and using magic to reemerge from another orifice. It is shown as mostly uncomfortable for the recipient and undertaken only as an alternative to being eaten (not the fun way).
  • Averted amusingly in this Fanficrants entry.
  • Trevor "Hotshot" Cole of DC Nation had a brief snit as a porn actor. When this is discovered, his female teammates and their friends track down the film and make a movie night of it. Batwoman (Kathy Duquense from DCAU) is notably impressed at Trevor's "door prize from God".
  • Actually played for drama in Misfiled Dreams, about how it being too big might not actually be pleasing for a woman, but rather painful.

FilmEdit

  • Gattaca feels the need to inform us that, despite his genetic "inferiority", Vincent has "beautiful equipment". It was actually a prosthetic, and the doctor knew this the whole time. He was admiring the craftsmanship.
  • Young Frankenstein went into about half a dozen jokes going on about the monster's enormous schwanzstucker. Voof.
    • "Ohhhhh sweet mystery of life at last I've found youuuuuuuu..."
  • In Blazing Saddles, the hero actually manages to convert a seductress hired by the villain to the good guys purely by impressing her with his penis.
    • I'm sorry to disappoint you, ma'am, but you're sucking on my elbow.
    • Baby please, I am not from Havana.
    • Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben!
    • It's twoo. It's TWOO!
    • And later: "They said you was hung!" "And they was right."
  • Inverted in A Chinese Torture Chamber Story, where it's also a plot point: Gott has such an impossibly large penis that no woman will have sex with him. He's also a very nice guy, so he refuses to force his arranged wife to take it. Eventually, the size of his genitals and what happens to them are the single most important plot point. This movie is weird.
  • Averted in Full Metal Jacket. "No! Too beaucoup! Too beaucoup!"
  • Lady Snowblood averts this. When the blackmailer Genjiro reveals his gigantic penis, the reaction from Oyuki, the title character, is not adulation, but horror. Genjiro himself is aware of the implications of his large penis, noting that one that large will usually cause the receiving woman serious pain. (In the manga it was made clear that Oyuki was a lesbian.)
  • Anchorman. Don't act like you're not impressed!
  • For the film Watchmen, the electric blue penis of the nearly-perpetually naked Doctor Manhattan lead to many, MANY, snickers about the blue wang being a main character. The extended directors version contains more scenes involving said character. A scene with Dr. Manhattan walking towards the camera, his thighs batting himself back and forth proved a last straw for the studio, who then drew the line. (It was not necessarily representative of Billy Crudup, who played the good doctor but was clothed the whole time. The doctor in his full magnificence was rendered via CGI in post production).
    • A review of the film made reference to "Lower Manhattan".
    • Snickers confirmed, since the good doctor was more modestly endowed in Alan Moore's original comic.
      • More modest than that? What, did he keep a microscope handy to prove it was there?
      • No, but it certainly isn't impressive, or average, really. But considering the fact that he can change size, his "work penis" is almost definitely smaller than his "leisure time penis".
  • In Moulin Rouge!, Ewan McGregor's character Christian is said to have a "Huge Talent".
  • In Alien Nation, apparently the Newcomers are "hung like a horse". George at one point becomes confused by the purpose of condoms. Sykes, somewhat reluctantly, takes pity on his new partner and explains the contraceptives purpose, rolling one over his fingers to demonstrate how it's supposed to be placed on the penis. George quizzically asks if the condom really fits, with Sykes answering that it's made of rubber and shows him that it stretches a great deal. George's response is a somewhat more quizzical "And it still fits?"
    • A failed groin attack also demonstrates the aliens' testes are differently located.
  • Meat from Porky's, who elicits a "That boy is deformed!" from a woman pretending to be a prostitute.
  • Tarik in Harold And Kumar Go To White Castle has a remarkably philosophical attitude about all the bad fortune he endures - he explains that having a big penis helps him cope.
  • Aversion: In the film Kinsey Alfred Kinsey and his wife have come to a doctor because they're having trouble consummating their marriage. The doctor explains that sometimes, if a woman with a thicker-than-usual hymen is matched with a well-endowed man, it can make sex tough. He holds out a ruler and asks Kinsey's wife to point to the ruler, indicating how big the...member in question is. She hesitates, then points to a spot in the air TWO INCHES past the end of the ruler. The doctor just raises his eyebrows a bit and says "I'm surprised you didn't pass out."
  • In Showdown in Little Tokyo, Brandon Lee's character accidentally looks in on Dolph Lundgren and Tia Carrera's characters' love scene. Later, as they both face death from a Torture Technician, Lee feels the need to complement his partner's equipment, in case he doesn't get another chance.
  • Invoked in Bedazzled. Brendan Fraser's character is granted 7 wishes, which he uses to attempt to woo the woman of his dreams. He wishes to be a famous athlete, but she is turned off when she discovers his tiny penis. Then, with his next wish, he specifically asks for a large penis, and ends up gay.
  • Averted in Dragnet (the 1987 film version) in a Does This Remind You Of Anything? bit:
Connie Swail (who has just been rescued from becoming a virgin sacrifice): How come his is so much bigger than yours?
Officer Joe Friday: Miss?
Connie Swail: The gun.
Officer Joe Friday: I've never needed more.

LiteratureEdit

  • Played seriously in Harlan Ellison's short story I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream, in which one of the main characters, Benny (a formerly gay and very handsome scientist), is transformed by AM into a apelike creature with horse-like genitalia. This may be Values Dissonance and/or Unfortunate Implications in action, as gay men can be as fond of this trope as straights (see, for example, the work of Tom of Finland); Ellison implies that AM made Benny ugly and partially retarded because he was handsome and smart, and that making him overendowed was to make him appealing to the one woman trapped in AM— a woman who the narrator describes as:"That douche bag! AM had left her alone, had made her more of a slut than she had ever been. All her talk of sweetness and light, all her memories of true love, all the lies she wanted us to believe: that she had been a virgin only twice removed before AM grabbed her and brought her down here with us. No, AM had given her pleasure, even if she said it wasn't nice to do."
  • The Anita Blake series is guilty of this. At the extreme end, a character is mentioned as having one six inches ... wide. And a foot long. Yes, a forearm-sized penis. Never mind that in real life it would be a painful handicap. Said character is derisively called 'Tripod' by fans and anti-fans alike.
    • And another character — considered to be merely "well-endowed" — was described in inches. Somebody measured that, and figured out that it would be the size of a two-liter soda pop bottle. And yet, we're supposed to think that a tiny woman can "handle" such a thing because she's simply that awesome.
    • Laurell K. Hamilton's second series begins (in sexual terms) pretty much where the Anita Blake series was at the time she started writing the new one. While the very concept of "too big to not hurt" is mentioned in both (the example above was being used as an example), the majority of the female (and male) characters can enjoy pain or outright insist on it. The concept of "big enough to kill a human woman" is also mentioned... but most of the females aren't human and can take a lot more damage. In the second series, when it comes to light that one man can be hung like a horse... literally, a woman is shown in misty-eyed regret that she never let herself experience that.
      • It must be noted that the aforementioned misty-eyed woman is the main character's insane, sadistic aunt, who is shown to be heavily into BDSM.
  • In Please Kill Me, a book about the late 1960s counterculture and the birth of punk, one of the interviewees explains the reason for Jim Morrison's popularity. It wasn't his poetry, that's for sure.
  • After her first session with a new love interest, the heroine of John Varley's Steel Beach specifically references this trope when she bitches at length about the tendency of first time Female-to-Male gender benders to check off the "HUNG" option even though they'd just been girls themselves and really ought to know better.
  • In David Drake's Cross the Stars, Don "Mad Dog" Slade dismisses the notion that a large penis equals sexual prowess ("It's not the size of the tool, it's the skill of the workman") but not until after the author mentions that his army buddies briefly called him "Tripod" before an earlier nickname reasserted itself.
  • Jondalar of the Earth's Children series spends much of Valley Of The Horses whining about how he can't find a woman who can take him at full length without pain (despite his otherwise legendary bed skills). The fact that Ayla could is one of the things that supposedly mark them as soul mates. Never mind that those who'd read the first book, Clan of The Cave Bear, know there's probably a not-so-wonderful reason Ayla can take him without complaint. His defining trait earned him the Detractor Nicknames , "Jondalar The Wonder Penis" and "Dongalar."
  • Mario Puzo takes a rather large detour from describing the Corleone family saga in The Godfather to describe Sonny's large penis. The moment makes it into the movie as well if you're looking for it during the wedding scene - watch his wife's hand gestures carefully. However, this is one of the few realistic examples: Sonny's mistress is pretty excessive down there too, and needs vaginal reduction surgery later on, in order to have good sex with lesser men than Sonny.
  • One of Larry Niven's characters in Known Space is a rich thrill-seeker nicknamed Elephant. For good reason. Or so his girlfriend claims.
  • Four of those procured for the main characters of the Marquis de Sade's 120 Days of Sodom are men selected entirely on the sizes of their penises. The best-endowed among them sports a member 13 inches long and 8.25 inches in circumference (2.6 inches in diameter).
    • One of those main characters, the Duc de Blangis, is similarly endowed. Averted, since he injures many people he has sex with, and is described as only having vaginal sex out of cruelty. His best friend the Durcet LOVES it. Also averted by the character Bum Cleaver, whose penis is bent in such a way that it tears whatever anus it goes in. (Again, Durcet and the other main characters don't seem to mind.)
    • Things get more out of hand, so to speak, in his Justine, one man has an organ 18 inches long by 16 in circumference, others are 18 by 12.
  • There is an Arabian Nights-inspired story in which two illicit lovers earn a single wish each at the story's beginning. The hero uses his one wish for the obvious type of self-improvement, allowing him to better please his lover: a genie's human betrothed. When the genie and her father come to kill her lover, the bride-to-be uses a magical bag to reduce the hero's penis to near-microscopic size. Seeing this, the genie is so humiliated to have lost his bride to such a poorly-endowed man that he departs in shame. Disgusted, the father disowns his daughter, leaving her to whatever feeble pleasure she might gain from wedding the ill-equipped hero... not realizing that she has one wish left.
  • In one of Pu Songling's fairy tales, the protagonist is too well endowed for any (human) woman to handle safely. So then a werefox tries to seduce him, he is overjoyed. Alas, he proves too big even for the shapeshifting fox, and narrator quips about how chasing away werefoxes could become his profession.
  • Mocked in one of the Deathlands novels; Doc Tanner's sometime girlfriend Lori runs off and has an affair with a local bad boy. She then returns to the group, complaining that his big dick came with a small brain. Ryan dryly remarks that he "hears that's often the way".
  • In the Red Dwarf novel Better Than Life, in the Better Than Life simulation, Rimmer tries to invoke this trope by acquiring artificial bodies with bigger and bigger penises, to the point where they approach Gag Penis levels. Unfortunately, instead of improving his sex life, it simply reveal Rimmer's huge insecurities, a point he is forced to confront himself over when he sees Lister's humble but happy life.
  • There is a Russian poem of unclear authorship called "Luka Mudischev". It is a story about a widow who looked for a really big dick, and found a 35 cm one attached to the eponymous guy (with his last name actually having that meaning)... Let's just say that the end is TRULY ghastly.
  • In The Hellfire Club by Peter Straub, the villain Serial Killer Dick Dart is repeatedly stated to have this. He's awfully proud of it, too, saying that his name was rather appropriate. He claims that women are crazy about him because of it, and he's shown to get very frustrated when he can't make Nora climax.
  • In John Ringo's There will be Dragons, a small (4'1) elf says she used to be married to a yeti. When asked why, she says, "Think about how big his hands are. Now think lower." The stunned audience goes, "Wha ... how... ?" and she replies "Everyone's the same height lying down."
  • Two of Tom Reamy's works of fiction (a short story and a novel) featured women raped to death (torn apart) by ridiculously well-endowed humanoid monsters (a demon and a minotaur). In one, the investigating detective measures out some massive amount of seminal fluid during the autopsy. Tom wrote well but he may have had issues of some sort.
  • In One Hundred Years Of Solitude, the eldest son, José Arcadio is described as headstrong, impulsive, and according to the traveling prostitute, has one of the largest pieces of genitalia she's ever seen.
  • In Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure, Fanny Hill seduces the virginal young squire of her current lover, and is both delighted and horrified to discover the young man is equipped with "the maypole of a young giant".
  • The genetically altered Minotaur in Piers Anthony's Battle Circle series Var the Stick had equipment so large it apparently crushes the internal organs of the recipient. Maidens are given to the creature as a sacrifice in this manner.
  • Deconstructed in-universe in, of all things, The 13th Warrior. The narrator, a well-traveled Arab, becomes the object of multiple women's passes, and eventually asks why. On learning that local gossip attests that Arabs are well-endowed in this respect, he muses about how every place he's ever visited has told similar rumors, always about the men of some distant land, and never in agreement about which distant land is so-gifted.
  • Deconstructed in one of the Montgomrey Chronicles books by Jude Deveraux: a minor character has a huge penis, but has a lousy sex life because not even the most experienced professionals will want to risk themselves handling that. Being given for him to rape is used as a sadistic threat against the female protagonist.
  • Subverted in Fool by Christopher Moore. The main character's apprentice, Drool, sports a Gag Penis. Several women comment that they wouldn't shag him even if he wasn't mentally retarded, as they wouldn't be able to sit down for a week. The only woman who can ride Drool without any problems is a ghost.
    • On the other hand, Drool, despite being dangerously retarded, IS considered great in bed when a woman finally lays with him. The ghost (who rode him and did all the work) spends most of the book chasing Drool, and the two women tricked into sex with him love it, even if they are sore afterwards. So it's more a Double Subversion.
  • In 120 Days of Sodom, by the Marquis de Sade, he goes in great detail on four of the 8 "fuckers" that the protagonists bring with them. None have anything under double-digits.
    • Averted in that Bande-Au-Ciel was taken over bigger ones because he was perpetually erect, as opposed to others who had difficulty with that. Note that he is still 11 inches long.
  • Averted in Graham Swift's Waterland. One character's too big for sex.

Live Action TVEdit

  • Coupling's Patrick Maitlan had a sex toy molded after him coming in at about ten inches.
Jeff: Even that bit?
Patrick: Especially that bit.
    • On said sex toy (although he had not realized that is what happened when an ex created it):Patrick:She said it was her best ever model, said she'd never had to use so much material.
Steve: Yeah, yeah. We know.
Jeff: There's big, there's balance problem.
Steve: And there's bazooka man.
    • This is actually used as psychological warfare by Sally to break up a bad date. She sends Patrick into the bathroom after him.Sally's Date: Oh, well. You know what women always say.Patrick: "Ouch"?
  • Subverted in an episode of Sex And The City. Samantha hooks up with a guy who warns her that he has an enormous penis. She is excited at first... until she sees it. When they do have sex, it turns out that it's too huge for her to take.
    • In another, she meets a man who is the model for the second-most successful sex toy in the United States (#1 in Canada). It turns out that he's tired of women only seeing him as a walking penis, and tries to impress her with his poetry. She's not interested in his poetry.
  • In a deleted scene from the Torchwood episode "Meat", in which the romantic rivalry between Jack and Rhys over Gwen comes to a climax, Ianto comments that he "half-expected [them] to get out the measuring tape." Jack, being Jack, apparently makes him, er, make his own estimate. (Which, by the way, might explain the "measuring tapes never lie" at the end of "Adam.")
  • In an episode of Rome, Atia sends Servilia the gift of a slave with a gigantic dick. Yes, we see all of it.Atia: A large penis is always welcome.
  • The MTV series The Hard Times of RJ Berger focuses on the class punching bag. One day, he gets pantsed during an assembly... and his underwear falls down in the process, granting the whole school an eyeful of his... yeah. Suddenly, his social life changes radically...
  • Averted in the J-drama Trick. Physics professor Ueda Jiro's oversized penis is frequently commented on, and although it once impressed another man, when it comes to women, it renders Ueda a virginal loser and the butt of jokes.

MusicEdit

  • Joe C.: "The Ladies' pick / I'm a crazy hick! / Three-foot-nine with a ten-foot-dick!"
  • Da Vinci's Notebook "Enormous Penis". "Whenever life gets you down..."
    • "My meat is murder"
  • Dyslexic Speedreaders (Mickey Avalon, Dirt Nasty, and Andre Legacy): My Dick "is like supersize"; your dick "is like two fries." It gets better (or worse) from there.
  • In Mc Chris's album Dungeon Master of Ceremonies, there is a skit where this is Lamp Shaded (so to speak). MC Chris learns that Jesus has a 4-foot penis, and asks if it hurts the women he has sex with. Jesus responds that he "magically extends their cervix up to about their chest area".
    • But it doesn't matter so much when you're having with dinosaur bird ladies.
  • Voltaire's "Worf's Revenge" To quote:When the ladies see the beast I got between my thighs
    They say "Perhaps today is a good day to die"
  • Then, there's Rodney Carrington's song, "12 inch dick, a dozen roses and a pickup truck." The song is a man singing about the three things he has that are going to make his woman happy tonight.
  • Butcher Pete by Roy Brown (part 1) (part 2) which was featured in Fallout 3, at first it sounds like a song about a Serial killer (fitting for the game) but if you pay attention you'll notice that it's actually about a Serial rapist (also fitting for the game) with a "long, sharp knife"
  • Amateur Transplants' "Titanic" subverts it:"Suddenly you panic, my dick is titanic, you know it won't fit, it's too long
    You scream, you're sick, it's eight inches thick, and we try but it all goes so wrong..."
  • Adam Sandler's 7 Foot Man from the Stan and Judy's Kid album."My last girlfriend died because my peniiiiiisssss...IS SEVEN FOOT WIIIIIIIIIDE!"
  • Frank Zappa's Bwana Dik from the Live at the Filmore '71 Album."My dick is a monster. Give me your heart. Bwana Dik is a legend, enormous thou art!"
  • "Big Dick" by NoMeansNo is pretty self-explanatory.
  • The appropriately named Ivor Biggun sings many songs about the attractiveness of men with large penises. "John Thomas Allcock" stands out by disclosing the dimensions of the member in question. The eponymous John is described as having a penis that measured 4 feet 6 inches flaccid and consequently being irresistible to women.

PornEdit

  • Everywhere in porn. Male porn stars can't be attributed with less than seven inches. Furthermore, the size stereotypes are fully perpetuated about how a girl becomes "ruined" for other men and only the guy with the big dick can satisfy her now. And the racial stereotype of "black guys are bigger than white guys (who are bigger than Asian guys, who are then bigger than Indian guys" is exploited for all its worth: "Once you go black, you'll never go back."
    • The black guy thing is parodied in The Amateurs, where a group of people creating a porn movie want a scene with black guys with big penises on a white girl, only to find out the black guys they hired don't have big penises.
    • Most male talent in the porn industry are at the high end of average (six inches plus), but are disproportionate compared to body size. Hence, small guys with high-end average endowments easily look like average guys with large endowments, and are far easier on the starlets. There are a few porn stars who are genuinely well endowed, though they're the exception than the rule. John Holmes (see below) as an example was, for practical purposes, limited to partners who could comfortably accomodate him.
  • John Holmes was credited to be the "largest" man in the industry. With a debatable exception of Tom Byron, Holmes certainly has had more sex on camera with more partners than any other man in history. He was twelve inches according to an interview with Ron Jeremy; ten-and-a-half according to some bios.
    • His case shows that the bigger is not necessarily the better; due to his extraordinary size, he was unable to achieve a full erection. His co-stars have stated that his penis was never particularly hard during intercourse, likening it to "doing it with a big, soft kind of loofah."
  • Much of the works featured on the Hentai-Foundry website have these. Many Characters are usually depicted having at least one improbably large... thing. And not just the men.
    • The benefit of animated pornography is that physics can be easily ignored, leading to plenty of instances of individuals somehow able to completely take organs larger than their torso. The only logical conlusion to be made is the existence of Orifice Hammerspace.
  • Jeff Stryker is another male actor famed for this. In fact, the dildo modeled after his member is the largest mass-produced "life-like" one. Though it's not likely an authentic representation. Striker is reputed to be about seven inches, but his smaller frame makes him look significantly larger.
  • "Vick" from the Teenburg porn site has an enormously long and thick penis. He can't seem to get it completely erect (he's a slim wiry guy), but he can get it up enough to work. His partners never seem to have any trouble taking it, even though many of them are rather petite.
  • Porn star Mandingo...his name is Mandingo for a reason.
  • Then there's Blackzilla, Yes you read that right. Other black contemporaries are Lexington Steele, Byron Long, Shane Diesel, and Jack Napier.
  • There was a reason why Ron Jeremy is something of a celebrity. He's joked about being a subversion - a running gag in the industry was that one of the things women dread in the porn industry (alongside bestiality and sado-masochism) was sex with Ron Jeremy.
    • Sex with the Hedgehog is joked as an issue for female talent, and it is indeed a point of concern for starlets new to the industry are put off by Jeremy's rather pedestrian appearance. On the other hand, Jeremy is well liked by the veteran pros for having significantly less of an ego than the more handsome (and these days, younger) male talent. He's also renowned as a bit of a sweetie, and an attentive lover.
    • Nine-and-a-half inches, according to his own confessional interviews, and since Ron Jeremy's package is what landed him in Playgirl, which then kick-started his porn career, it's probably true.
  • Several websites, such as Freaks of Cock and Fucked-Up Facials (they're really the same site with different names), have women do the normal routine with a few guys, then finish with a "surprise", being several men with obviously fake penises up to 14 inches to give her a facial that covers her whole body.
    • Actually, in one episode of a related site, Cumshot Surprise, they don't even bother trying to hide the fact that it's fake. The "victimized" girl gets into her "assailant's" limo to clean off and the prop is clearly sitting next to the guy on the seat.
  • A certain Brazilian porn star uses as his stage name Kid Bengala - "Kid walking stick", a reference to a cane he brandishes which has the same size as his... working instrument.

Tabletop GamesEdit

  • The infamous RPG FATAL. Let's just say this trope affects your character sheet.
  • On a similar note the infamous 'Lidda and the Ogre' Dungeons & Dragons fanfic.
  • GURPS has a feature for males called "enhanced primary sexual characteristics".
  • In the Shadowrun game, a magician's astral body conforms to his or her "idealized self-image". This made for an amusing scene in the Shadowrun novel Burning Bright, when mage Kyle Teller appears to two female characters in his naked astral body. Comparison to rumors about male trolls, orks, and "even dwarfs" follow.

TheaterEdit

  • The Commedia dell'arte thought that this was hysterical and actors often used comically large fake penises for simulated sex on stage.
  • Implied in Les Miserables. Thernadier's wife is annoyed because her husband "thinks he's quite a lover but there's not much there."

Video GamesEdit

  • In Fate/Stay Night, Rin actually freaks out when she sees Shirou naked.
    • Admittedly, she was a virgin and extremely nervous (so was Shirou, for that matter); Saber and Sakura are admiring, but not shocked. Shiki, on the other hand, managed to impress even the relatively experienced Kohaku.
  • In Grand Theft Auto San Andreas, Mike Toreno, in one of his calls to C.J., makes mention of how Sweet is getting a new cellmate in prison, a guy known only as "Horse Cock Harry." We never do meet the guy, but while the "eight kilometers of cock" line is very much an exaggeration on Toreno's part, it's made abundantly clear that Sweet is going to have a really bad time of it.
  • The conversation a male PC has in Neverwinter Nights 2 with that one demon in Jerro's Haven who questions your gender, and especially Neeshka's attempts to back you up.
  • In Katamari Damacy, there's the Bulge of All Cosmos. In one game, The King mentions "the size of Our royal thing". Yeah.

Web ComicsEdit

  • In Boy Meets Boy, Mikhael's "freakishly large" penis is supposedly the main reason why his and Harley's sex life is so good, which in turn seems to be one major reason why their relationship is so good. It's really best not to over-analyze this comic.
  • Ellen from Questionable Content brings up this trope due to being apparently worried about sex since her only experience was watching porn about guys with a case of this. Her boyfriend worries about what she'll think of his in comparison, and she tells him she's relieved since it looked painful.
    • Also, in one strip when Raven asks Dora about Marten's penis size, to shut her up Dora tells her "It's about the size of my forearm and fist, and just as dexterous." Raven then tries to diagram this on the coffee shop chalkboard to figure out how he fits it in his pants.
  • If you don't get this XKCD comic, say his wish out loud.
    • He could have wished for a very small pianist to play his piano with?
    • Which is itself the logical inversion of the old saw about a hard-of-hearing Literal Genie and a twelve-inch pianist.
    • Have you heard the one about the man with the 11" cigarette lighter?
    • xkcd also has this (maybe NSFW) to say.
  • Jason from Something Positive may be both a use and subversion of this trope. One one hand, he was extremely popular with the ladies prior to his marriage, but, on the other hand, the only woman we've actually seen reacting to it onscreen responded with an expression of terror and the words "Uh, Jason? Could you please put that big ... thing back in your pants? It hurts my pelvis to look at it." We don't see the appendage in question, so you have to use your imagination.
  • Implied in Order of the Stick with Elan (18 Charisma!).
  • Implied in Horndog with the strip's main character, Bob.
  • Peter of Peter Is The Wolf. Other than that one "feature", Peter is the runt of his pack; small for a human, let alone a werewolf. But he still keeps his girlfriend happy...
    • In his wolf form, it's the only thing that gets bigger, and he can hit himself in the face with it.
  • Kyle from Juvenile Diversion is well endowed, which leads to some very enjoyable times for Jenny.
  • Outright stated as such in Jay Naylor's Huckleberry Ann.
  • Appears in the NSFW webcomic Sexy Losers, where one of the main characters is a mother who lusts after her son. In one strip she sees that he has a huge penis... which he unfortunately didn't inherit from his father.
  • Carrie from Loserz met a guy "with a dick like a python" in this strip.

Web OriginalEdit

  • Occurs in the Whateley Universe to the character Phase. She's a guy who was turned into a girl, but her 'equipment' did not change, and is in fact getting BIGGER. Also, Chad/Merry/Paige/Petra suffers from this, except that s/he has both sets of equipment.
    • Averted in the Ask Sara section of the forum, where it is stated, bluntly, that no, a big dick does not cause better sex, and YES, it can be painful if it's too big. And people neglect girth. (According to Sara, there's no difference from about 4-12 inches... lower than four, no G-spot.) Three inches girth is good.
      • For those skimming: that's girth, not thickness. Three inches thickness is a Morton Salt container.
  • This trope causes much pain to Protectors of the Plot Continuum. See the Fan Fic section for a couple of examples of what they've had to combat.
  • Sites like Literotica have a real problem with writers submitting stories where men have bizarrely proportioned genitals. Like a penis ten inches long and eight inches wide.
  • Artist nikoh combines this with Hermaphrodites and Naruto females, mostly Hinata. Averted by the Uke men, who are average in size.

Western AnimationEdit

  • South Park, "Chinpokomon": In this episode, a bunch of Japanese businessmen are using the South Park universe's version of Pokémon in order to brainwash American kids into Japanese soldiers. When any of the adults get suspicious, they flatter the men by saying they have such big, American penises (combines with Gag Penis in that they use some rather comedic descriptive words), while their Japanese penises are so tiny. This tactic works every time, so it's up to the women to make the men realize what's going on.
    • The episode title is a Bilingual Bonus referring to this; "chinpo" is Japanese for "penis", and "chinpoko" is a diminutive. Thus, "Chinpokomon" literally means "[small] penis monsters".
    • From the theme song during one season: "I have got a ten-inch penis / Use your mouth to help me clean it."
  • The Health Inspector and his 3 foot penis. There is no censor bar in the DVD version. And it leads straight to Prison Rape.
  • The Venture Brothers had an assassination attempt on Brock Sampson while he was in the shower. When his towel falls off, the assassins slowly break into applause.
    • Don't forget the first season episode where he was interrupted in the middle of Molotov Cocktease. And it's shaped like a brick.
  • Chris Griffin, surprisingly enough, to the chagrin of his father.
  • Ned Flanders is apparently very well-endowed◊ (don't worry, it's work safe).
  • A running gag in Archer is that Cyril's is bigger than the titular super-spy's and leads to his "sex addiction."

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